tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21018160891259958092024-03-14T06:17:22.866+05:30Just outThis blog deals with global news that concerns all of us. I write my own opinionated news to make it an interesting read.Watch out for subtle humor;read between the lines.Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.comBlogger1012125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-66544104096961210962018-06-25T20:35:00.000+05:302018-06-25T20:35:01.361+05:30Successful man and woman!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
It takes considerable knowledge just to realise the extent of your own ignorance!<br />
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Weather forecast for tonight: dark!<br />
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A successful man is one who makes more money than what his wife could spend.<br />
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A successful woman is one who can find such a man!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-60310537958150387182018-06-23T19:55:00.003+05:302018-06-23T19:56:51.161+05:30Hangout!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar!<br />
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Be stupid, be funny, be dumb, if that's who you are.<br />
Don't try to be someone that society wants you to be; that's stupid.<br />
so be yourself.<br />
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Laziness is nothing more than the habit of taking rest before getting tired!<br />
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I can resist anything except temptation!<br />
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I found there was only one way to look thin... hangout with fat people!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-3914130672128510122018-05-17T17:03:00.004+05:302018-05-17T17:03:28.891+05:30Bermuda Triangle!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFxaFXm8Mcga5jHkC9HQenFhuBBZKpUxosj0gMiWFJhDutUEY_rj-f2DljYCbPPS_vq41_EgF3aMn2UJb0S-OTEKyG-uV29WNw8_05XyK6hJ06xxxAN5G48N4P0VO4aKPe8hpIn-WNGUxX/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="228" data-original-width="221" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiFxaFXm8Mcga5jHkC9HQenFhuBBZKpUxosj0gMiWFJhDutUEY_rj-f2DljYCbPPS_vq41_EgF3aMn2UJb0S-OTEKyG-uV29WNw8_05XyK6hJ06xxxAN5G48N4P0VO4aKPe8hpIn-WNGUxX/s200/c.jpg" width="193" /></a>If only women could read minds,<br />
every second man gets slapped!<br />
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My brain is like the Bermuda Triangle, <br />
Information goes in and it's never found again!<br />
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Wise men talk because they have something to say<br />
Fools talk because they have to say something!<br />
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Don't take life too seriously<br />
You will never get out of it alive!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-17580408052449660342018-05-16T15:29:00.002+05:302018-05-16T15:29:46.738+05:30Fake sleep!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b>I</b> am sorry I hurt your feelings when I called you stupid;<br />
I really thought you already know.<br />
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<b>A</b> day without coffee is like....<br />
Just kidding, I don't know!<br />
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<b>W</b>hen you fake sleep to help your toddler sleep,<br />
Then you wake up from a 4-hour nap!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-69791396978946760572018-05-13T21:52:00.000+05:302018-05-13T21:52:01.270+05:30I never make the same mistake twice...!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQzGaLr1YC1_SFJwJobYiC1Co_LOUekPr3YRpOQrkY1u2G6LhIpjOup2kSxbRSZlePg_VEAPGSs-qC0XvFr3qKGzyIu4tEyxIb2SALHsEuiLxb_fco0tHdrevibEiNUR9FxgjO9FzJp1y6/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiQzGaLr1YC1_SFJwJobYiC1Co_LOUekPr3YRpOQrkY1u2G6LhIpjOup2kSxbRSZlePg_VEAPGSs-qC0XvFr3qKGzyIu4tEyxIb2SALHsEuiLxb_fco0tHdrevibEiNUR9FxgjO9FzJp1y6/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a><b>8</b>7% of youngsters are suffering from back pain. <br />
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<b>I</b>t's the people who try to be clever, who never are;<br />
the people who are clever, never think of trying to be.<br />
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<b>I</b> never make the same mistake twice. I do it five or six times, just to be sure.<br />
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<b>M</b>y room is not really messy it's an obstacle course designed to keep me fit.<br />
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<b>W</b>hen I count my blessings, I count you twice!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-27686782416736984812018-05-10T20:53:00.001+05:302018-05-10T20:53:29.645+05:30Some people are like clouds...!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW5IjOeq0-08mk_K1sNdvuhE9p3FDEqAcRb2o12Ek-hv3HqkZF3ODVbVD1kELPHlJ_arsz1I7ddr3bYQOVFSZNd0cyFZMpMTWFgA6VG7IQfj5YRX8hu1FPZDDphOFDkIJBW5lVLadVjILG/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="205" data-original-width="246" height="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhW5IjOeq0-08mk_K1sNdvuhE9p3FDEqAcRb2o12Ek-hv3HqkZF3ODVbVD1kELPHlJ_arsz1I7ddr3bYQOVFSZNd0cyFZMpMTWFgA6VG7IQfj5YRX8hu1FPZDDphOFDkIJBW5lVLadVjILG/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a>Some people are like clouds, when they disappear it is a beautiful day!<br />
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I like when you smile... but I love it when I'm the reason! <br />
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Some times I wonder how you put up with me...then when I remember how I put up with with you, So we are even.<br />
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There are 2 types of people in the world.<br />
1. Those who understand and appreciate sarcasm<br />
2. Idiots<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-69471935203568656392018-04-10T17:25:00.002+05:302018-04-10T17:25:39.060+05:30Left a million dollars under the...!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGID9ukOwv8GS3J74PzVNIUpCXfJMQpmX1YcIKXHDFbVTB-AhdtV1irROz-OiZtuXawhAn7ouLOf9xBxJG3L2D6cvhK-YZ0rnd3d2tPtHkrqPQwzxJsK75lapdWwEYmyC6vMiPjQm1zQfC/s1600/images.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="183" data-original-width="275" height="133" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGID9ukOwv8GS3J74PzVNIUpCXfJMQpmX1YcIKXHDFbVTB-AhdtV1irROz-OiZtuXawhAn7ouLOf9xBxJG3L2D6cvhK-YZ0rnd3d2tPtHkrqPQwzxJsK75lapdWwEYmyC6vMiPjQm1zQfC/s200/images.jpg" width="200" /></a><b>W</b>hen I die, I want my last words to be, "I left a million dollars under the ..."<br />
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<b>Y</b>ou will never know a woman until she is drunk and nasty with you!<br />
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<b>W</b>hat do people do with the time they save writing "K" instead of "OK"?<br />
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<b>B</b>e extremely careful while you follow the Masses, often M may be silent!<br />
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<b>I</b>f only closed minds come with closed mouths...!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-67226963554463027652018-04-08T18:39:00.002+05:302018-04-08T18:39:50.657+05:30Wine and woman!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjts_rpKaT6XF2hnk728DGEwQQJMjU7_V91pSMFdLBof7OIrJIP6PxV3Es0_kl6S0mhH7UpkEhUIzb91SAPiZG9iVsrk0NowpdNSKXqIZgl-rCwrHB_277Co7zSxCY5lYZjfee-FV_NVSI2/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="189" data-original-width="267" height="141" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjts_rpKaT6XF2hnk728DGEwQQJMjU7_V91pSMFdLBof7OIrJIP6PxV3Es0_kl6S0mhH7UpkEhUIzb91SAPiZG9iVsrk0NowpdNSKXqIZgl-rCwrHB_277Co7zSxCY5lYZjfee-FV_NVSI2/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a>Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please!<br />
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Wine is a constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy!<br />
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Go to Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company!<br />
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A woman's mind is clearer than that man's because she changes it more often!<br />
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Laugh and the world laughs with you; snore and you sleep alone!<br />
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Lead us not into temptation; just tell us where it is, we will find it!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-52005693523864782792018-03-27T21:30:00.000+05:302018-03-27T21:30:14.819+05:30Cannibals and clowns!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ8LlBQk883ypYdAVzucnhjiFsan3BuomuhWMBReoF2hy3-spEPLDxnCfY0aS96VpVcNMN4sSjizstQ2Esa023CadNMTpSgpYlsAO4TFFBR9joR71v6bhfDvQK93JCdzVky2j1_71emzkP/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="210" data-original-width="241" height="173" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZ8LlBQk883ypYdAVzucnhjiFsan3BuomuhWMBReoF2hy3-spEPLDxnCfY0aS96VpVcNMN4sSjizstQ2Esa023CadNMTpSgpYlsAO4TFFBR9joR71v6bhfDvQK93JCdzVky2j1_71emzkP/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a>Why don't cannibals eat clowns?<br />
Because they taste funny!<br />
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Why did the mushroom go to the party?<br />
Because he was a fungi!<br />
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Why did the farmer win an award?<br />
He was outstanding in his field!<br />
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Why did a chicken coop have only two doors?<br />
If it had four doors, it would be a chicken Sedan!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-8382252539283881372018-03-26T14:31:00.000+05:302018-03-26T14:31:27.572+05:30Russian porn!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsgj63hodD9165LRKLPkpbhi_iFCuIpr3U9vUbo6iHE6g5O7onC1pxYGn26bnpijcgfdjclsPpIc_5eLNtnvAfrz-eB6eJiIT_YEF7Db_tcPeY4IB6HrUcTCOdeSJbQuKeCfaLvYR62XLn/s1600/c.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="218" data-original-width="231" height="188" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsgj63hodD9165LRKLPkpbhi_iFCuIpr3U9vUbo6iHE6g5O7onC1pxYGn26bnpijcgfdjclsPpIc_5eLNtnvAfrz-eB6eJiIT_YEF7Db_tcPeY4IB6HrUcTCOdeSJbQuKeCfaLvYR62XLn/s200/c.png" width="200" /></a>What does Russian porn get you?<br />
Russian porn gets me Soviet!<br />
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What is the difference between snowman and snow-woman?<br />
Snowballs!<br />
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What do you call a fake spaghetti?<br />
An im-pasta!<br />
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What did the yoga teacher say when her landlord tried to evict her?<br />
Namaste!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-50075721770229552462018-03-25T22:13:00.004+05:302018-03-25T22:13:59.495+05:30Smart replies!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3xkovzzzhRj7DU4of2uFVXpVwyDmP9J557BcB5ucDYVoU29Tj0W5qv5N2-t2DVFoK7o9MmANZ61y9e5m1EiaQLHoxxR4vde6ZtMIAK7eqKdS6rM6dBdy0Vmz8ABVsh8D7Psik41f7Jqqy/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="180" data-original-width="280" height="128" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj3xkovzzzhRj7DU4of2uFVXpVwyDmP9J557BcB5ucDYVoU29Tj0W5qv5N2-t2DVFoK7o9MmANZ61y9e5m1EiaQLHoxxR4vde6ZtMIAK7eqKdS6rM6dBdy0Vmz8ABVsh8D7Psik41f7Jqqy/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a>What do you call a sleepwalking nun?<br />
A Roamin' Catholic!<br />
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What do you call a factory that sells good quality products?<br />
A SatisFactory!<br />
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What did one tomato tell the other tomato during a running race?<br />
Ketchup!<br />
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What do sea monsters eat?<br />
Fish and ships!<br />
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What do you call birds that stick together?<br />
Vel-Crows!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-71716078612965403222018-01-26T22:27:00.001+05:302018-01-26T22:27:09.346+05:30The duck in drug store!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIZ4XExdY1st_91ynEYCNTZEl9h8XGFjGURiq9EEBdfPMH4LHRjeLlTTuws1SWbRCAnKHJJoo2fQ0xm17t9WH74lxi_sm9i6kR6dqnK_-RC4egfIJ8OPXRRJVd78CSzEBbj6pObjBzA2Yv/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="231" data-original-width="218" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIZ4XExdY1st_91ynEYCNTZEl9h8XGFjGURiq9EEBdfPMH4LHRjeLlTTuws1SWbRCAnKHJJoo2fQ0xm17t9WH74lxi_sm9i6kR6dqnK_-RC4egfIJ8OPXRRJVd78CSzEBbj6pObjBzA2Yv/s200/c.jpg" width="188" /></a><b>A</b> duck walks into a drug store and asks for a tube of ChapStick. <br />
The store assistant locates the tube and informs the duck that the tube costs $1.29.<br />
The duck replies, "Okay. Put it on my bill."<br />
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<b>J</b>ack and Joe went to a forest for hunting. When they were chasing an animal, Joe keeled over . Jack was panicky and dialed 911 for help. He said in a shivering voice, "My friend suddenly dropped dead. What am I supposed to do now?"<br />
A soothing voice at the other end said, "Don't worry, I can help. First of all make sure that your friend is dead."<br />
There was a brief silence and a gun shot was heard by the operator. Jack picked up the phone once again and said, "Okay, what do I do now?" <br />
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Source: Readers' Digest<br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-63996255429068514362018-01-22T22:39:00.002+05:302018-01-22T22:39:07.307+05:30St. Peter and the HMO Manager!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<b>T</b>wo doctors and a HMO Manager die and wait at the entrance of Pearly Gate for an interview with St. Peter. <br />
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNfGWupbrZXyCXbS_JVXPByzCTbjEBUTguMjKrWIAFsQEYYd9I-U8dVkY7BjfsvPE1970-mik2gD5Eqadtj8cPpKOwBrtKO0srJ9Myl7ZUD1zWnJYeAsPU0fosyjz-z6ednZaX4yebsYeD/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="224" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNfGWupbrZXyCXbS_JVXPByzCTbjEBUTguMjKrWIAFsQEYYd9I-U8dVkY7BjfsvPE1970-mik2gD5Eqadtj8cPpKOwBrtKO0srJ9Myl7ZUD1zWnJYeAsPU0fosyjz-z6ednZaX4yebsYeD/s200/c.jpg" width="199" /></a>The first doctor, a pediatrician, meets St. Peter and states that he has saved the lives of a lot of poor children in his country. St. Peter asks him to enter Heaven.<br />
The other doctor says, "I am a psychiatrist and I have helped thousands of people lead a peaceful life." St. Peter allows him in.<br />
The third person, a HMO Manager states, "I got countless families cost-effective healthcare." <br />
St. Peter replies, "You may enter, but you can stay here for just 3 days. Thereafter you will go to Hell!"<br />
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<b>A</b> young man called the directory for assistance. "Hello, I would like the telephone number of Mary Jones in Phoenix, Arizona."<br />
"There are multiple listings of that name in Phoenix, Arizona", replied the operator. "Do you have a street name?"<br />
The young man hesitated for a while and said, "Well, most of the people call me Ice Man."<br />
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<b>T</b>he owner of a cinema theatre in New York City passed away at the age of 65. A newspaper published the following message about his funeral:<br />
"The funeral will be held on Wednesday at 2:15 pm, 4:30 pm, 6:45 pm and 9:00 pm."<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Readers' Digest</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-22840379209181128502018-01-21T21:50:00.001+05:302018-01-21T21:51:23.036+05:30Jokers jokes!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxn6t_wcBFDWbukq02ama5asDVghn4rqk5eS7c6YYEvlQbBCeX5sprvTc2Kohjuh0LikhfqjyGBdlOBFpgyLAtOTu-gyDMCCEiM_vRuGi7esN5DUuGuZWJ-eYKvkT3QMRcA-fFUR6ePISo/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxn6t_wcBFDWbukq02ama5asDVghn4rqk5eS7c6YYEvlQbBCeX5sprvTc2Kohjuh0LikhfqjyGBdlOBFpgyLAtOTu-gyDMCCEiM_vRuGi7esN5DUuGuZWJ-eYKvkT3QMRcA-fFUR6ePISo/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a><b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">CRICKET ISN'T</b> our national sport; hockey is. Which is weird, because whenever I see a dude with a hockey stick, my first thought is never, "Wow, this man will make our country proud." It's always "He's going to thrash somebody."<b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"> TANMAY BHAT</b>, <b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><i style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">comedian, AIB </i></b></div>
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<b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">I WAS ONCE INVITED</b> to entertain at an anniversary. When I reached the venue, a man led me to the function. "Ladies and gentlemen," he announced. "MrRajuSrivastav. It's going to be a memorable night." After regaling the audience for nearly an hour, when I reached the hotel's lobby, another man came up to me and said angrily, "We've been looking for you for an hour!"</div>
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"I have just entertained your guests!" I exclaimed, only to realize that I'd been tricked into performing at the wrong function. <b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><i style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">Comedian</i></b> <b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">RAJU SRIVASTAV</b></div>
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A man is on the phone with someone. "I have to go," he says. "I'm getting a better call." <b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">ANUVAB PAL</b>, <i style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">stand-up comedian and screenwriter, on his favourite cartoon from The New Yorker</i><br />
<b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">A MAN SENT</b> in 10 entries to a joke competition. He didn't win. No pun intended.<br />
<b style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">ASHISH SHAKYA,</b> <i style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;">comedian, AIB. "I saw this joke in Reader's Digest when I was around 10 years old. I thought, 'Oh, this is the best thing I've ever read in my life.'"</i></div>
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<span style="margin: 0px; padding: 0px;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Readers' Digest</span></span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-1660998078106531272018-01-20T22:53:00.001+05:302018-01-20T22:53:13.722+05:30Invent a new word!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgu_y7KzZdmHbDuE9wlGFnRubrc9_KVIX0Z1IRQ42hO8qUIIs2Fr_gTmRlNwRM2amYZbreeGg3QLtvNglMoUWdj5ARC0I6no922_5ezAG_c7swQ5Q8HfXIAYPZFUdVj5m1QFzB9OUbPEyj_/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="194" data-original-width="259" height="149" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgu_y7KzZdmHbDuE9wlGFnRubrc9_KVIX0Z1IRQ42hO8qUIIs2Fr_gTmRlNwRM2amYZbreeGg3QLtvNglMoUWdj5ARC0I6no922_5ezAG_c7swQ5Q8HfXIAYPZFUdVj5m1QFzB9OUbPEyj_/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a><b>C</b>an you tell me what is the best thing about Switzerland?<br />
I don't really know. But the flag is a Big Plus!<br />
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<b>C</b>an you invent a new word?<br />
Plagiarism!<br />
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<b>H</b>ave you heard about a mathematician who is afraid of negative numbers?<br />
He will stop at nothing to avoid them!<br />
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<b>W</b>hy do we tell actors to "break a leg"?<br />
Because every play has a cast.<br />
Did you hear about an actor who fell through the floorboards?<br />
He was just going through a stage!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Readers' Digest</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-41809107399011333952018-01-19T22:33:00.003+05:302018-01-19T22:33:47.878+05:30Email message and meaning!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<header class="jokes-river--header" style="background-color: white; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: Montserrat, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><h3 class="jokes-river--title" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; clear: both; color: #985ca4; font-size: 1em; font-style: inherit; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px 0px 0.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="https://www.rd.com/joke/translate-work-emails/" rel="bookmark" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #985ca4; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 250ms ease; vertical-align: baseline;">How To Translate Work Emails</a></h3>
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I have a question. = I have 18 questions.</div>
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I’ll look into it. = I’ve already forgotten about it.</div>
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I tried my best. = I did the bare minimum.</div>
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Happy to discuss further. = Don’t ask me about this again.</div>
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No worries. = You really messed up this time.</div>
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Take care. = This is the last you’ll ever hear from me.</div>
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Cheers! = I have no respect for you or myself!</div>
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<header class="jokes-river--header" style="box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: montserrat, sans-serif; font-size: 16px;"><h3 class="jokes-river--title" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; clear: both; color: #985ca4; font-size: 1em; font-style: inherit; line-height: 1.5; margin: 0px 0px 0.5em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<a href="https://www.rd.com/joke/154612/" rel="bookmark" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #985ca4; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 250ms ease; vertical-align: baseline;">The Mystery Kitchen Utensil…</a></h3>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwVZAnzddz6ydfdmXFBmxo4ZaZAXiFQtlpjku4SPQ0d0X47pN67faeYkqW2nNlNhmofhV2F_idrli0tB3eMDXEuWEisRYIsKpZkpkFSfuphEguf-OfqgHFdjMm2ldlqIRrXJLAQKPqB7cp/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; color: #333333; float: right; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; font-size: 1.25em; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhwVZAnzddz6ydfdmXFBmxo4ZaZAXiFQtlpjku4SPQ0d0X47pN67faeYkqW2nNlNhmofhV2F_idrli0tB3eMDXEuWEisRYIsKpZkpkFSfuphEguf-OfqgHFdjMm2ldlqIRrXJLAQKPqB7cp/s200/c.jpg" width="200" /></a><div style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: inherit; font-size: 20px; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
My collection of vintage kitchen utensils includes one whose intended purpose was always a mystery. It looks like a cross between a metal slotted spoon and a spatula, so I use it as both. When not in use, it is prominently displayed in a decorative ceramic utensil caddy in my kitchen.</div>
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The mystery of the spoon/spatula was recently solved when I found one in its original packaging at a rummage sale.</div>
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It’s a pooper-scooper.</div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: montserrat, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; letter-spacing: 0.4375px;">Source: Internet</span></span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-74931784105455252932018-01-15T21:56:00.001+05:302018-01-15T22:02:28.247+05:30Fly killer!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<em style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">SCENE: My teenage daughter and me in the car.</em></div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Lauren:</span> Dad, do you know what the most commonly used letter in a girl’s name is?</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Me:</span> Hmm, is it a consonant or a vowel? (<em style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Silence</em>.) Please tell me you know what consonants and vowels are.</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Lauren:</span> You’re no fun, Dad. Forget it.</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Me:</span> What is a vowel?</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Lauren:</span> OK, OK. A vowel is … ahh … eh … well, oh … uh …</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: 700; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Me:</span> Close enough.</div>
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<em style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; font-family: inherit; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">—<span style="font-size: x-small;">by Robert Alvarez, author of <a href="https://www.wattpad.com/story/34222703-blonde-moments-life-with-a-blonde-teenage-daughter" style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #985ca4; font-family: inherit; font-style: inherit; font-weight: inherit; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; text-decoration-line: none; transition: all 250ms ease; vertical-align: baseline;" target="_blank">Blonde Moments: Life with a Blonde Teenage Daughter</a></span></em></div>
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If you understand English, press 1. If you do not understand English, press 2.</div>
<div style="background-color: white; border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #333333; font-family: "noto serif", georgia, serif; margin-bottom: 0.75em; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">
<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #222222; font-family: "montserrat" , sans-serif; font-size: x-small; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Recording on an Australian tax help line</span></div>
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I bought one of those tapes to teach you Spanish in your sleep. During the night, the tape skipped. Now I can only stutter in Spanish.</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCQkWuQe71pMCvyH87jvBGvKQqzlWV5wPwwq0Z2GH6-INKAlWRi4oqa2cVgIGvwioONUfFZsuOmI1Pbk6Zltl0guBg5x2c63gSpF1SUkq-NRaLqhcQusLj54a60vb_D64jWSqrO3y1uTFW/s1600/c.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiCQkWuQe71pMCvyH87jvBGvKQqzlWV5wPwwq0Z2GH6-INKAlWRi4oqa2cVgIGvwioONUfFZsuOmI1Pbk6Zltl0guBg5x2c63gSpF1SUkq-NRaLqhcQusLj54a60vb_D64jWSqrO3y1uTFW/s200/c.png" width="200" /></a><span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #222222; font-family: "montserrat" , sans-serif; font-size: 0.875rem; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Steven Wright</span></div>
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My three-year-old daughter stuck out her hand and said, “Look at the fly I killed, Mommy.” Since she was eating a juicy pickle at the time, I thrust her contaminated hands under the faucet and washed them with antibacterial soap.<br />
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After sitting her down to finish her pickle, I asked, with a touch of awe, “How did you kill that fly all by yourself?”<br />
Between bites, she said, “I hit it with my pickle.”</div>
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<span style="border: 0px; box-sizing: inherit; color: #222222; font-family: "montserrat" , sans-serif; font-size: 0.875rem; font-weight: inherit; letter-spacing: 0.03125em; margin: 0px; outline: 0px; padding: 0px; vertical-align: baseline;">Cindy Yates, Mill Valley, California</span></div>
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<span style="color: #222222; font-family: "montserrat" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 14px; letter-spacing: 0.4375px;">Courtesy: Readers' Digest</span></span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-87321398429160992312018-01-11T15:21:00.001+05:302018-01-11T15:21:43.372+05:30Desserter!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBjj4xhMx2xpU9MtzT8tZzdrP0xQ8izmwokLHxr9w9Ngr2Ri8xfydAWcQ6GWZs5B9szpV7tj9Ck0SCncPsvczdI_N9uaQQ-OqVn0YqenBhWMxx1RbhckqpHVPe2wZC07w_PxGLwcNu9Yx4/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="341" data-original-width="239" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBjj4xhMx2xpU9MtzT8tZzdrP0xQ8izmwokLHxr9w9Ngr2Ri8xfydAWcQ6GWZs5B9szpV7tj9Ck0SCncPsvczdI_N9uaQQ-OqVn0YqenBhWMxx1RbhckqpHVPe2wZC07w_PxGLwcNu9Yx4/s200/c.jpg" width="139" /></a><b>T</b>he patient was very nervous as it was the first surgery he underwent.<br />
The anesthetist gave him confidence with a few words of kindness and added, " Sir please rest assured that everything will go well. If at all your life is endangered, it will be because of the anesthesia administered and definitely not by the surgery!"<br />
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<b>Q</b>: What do you call a person who doesn't stick to his diet? <br />
A: A desserter!<br />
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<b>W</b>oman to pharmacist: "Can you give some vitamin tablets for my son?"<br />
Pharmacist: "Vitamin A, B, C or D?"<br />
Woman: "It doesn't really matter. You give me any one of these tablets. My son can't read!"<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Readers' Digest </span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-45535597611847591522018-01-04T17:40:00.004+05:302018-01-04T17:43:15.559+05:30Christmas chores!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGuTx_BmAh4TBmarP9qrn24Z9OL6Et5HylCyk0-0onQ-N9kRdF4DGfIcV84nz3n-wXpjTkpClfw9jC_R2E2tW6oTUNXcXSFF0JWC0IT3B5WgWPAWPQ9r3vX-Ar1H6qyBV1AiNYfwjCfqrZ/s1600/c.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="225" data-original-width="225" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjGuTx_BmAh4TBmarP9qrn24Z9OL6Et5HylCyk0-0onQ-N9kRdF4DGfIcV84nz3n-wXpjTkpClfw9jC_R2E2tW6oTUNXcXSFF0JWC0IT3B5WgWPAWPQ9r3vX-Ar1H6qyBV1AiNYfwjCfqrZ/s200/c.png" width="200" /></a>Q: What do reindeer say before they crack a joke?<br />
A: This will sleigh you! <br />
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Q: Why did the couple get hitched on December 24?<br />
A: Because they could have a Married Christmas!<br />
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Q: How do you lift a frozen car?<br />
A: With a Jack Frost!<br />
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Q: Which holiday mascot has the least spare change?<br />
A: St. Nickel-less!<br />
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Q: Why didn't Rudolph get good report card?<br />
A: Because he went down in History!<br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Readers Digest</span><br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-49457486520812587972017-12-19T16:34:00.003+05:302017-12-19T16:35:14.075+05:30Blonde and the brain cell!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWeoTBFA5ZHLWw1l8MU1ij0hzOAGlcGMB9QCPm-xTSeW1OW1vyyd561sE99bgeOMZ5WZhDQEfN-7LzRCb8zMFzXmHtdrvAK7LkERE9FCN-edOSA9IobQWUrWRK2ZXIPbHyn9maqLbkIFnm/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="272" data-original-width="185" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWeoTBFA5ZHLWw1l8MU1ij0hzOAGlcGMB9QCPm-xTSeW1OW1vyyd561sE99bgeOMZ5WZhDQEfN-7LzRCb8zMFzXmHtdrvAK7LkERE9FCN-edOSA9IobQWUrWRK2ZXIPbHyn9maqLbkIFnm/s200/c.jpg" width="136" /></a><b style="color: #181818; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, serif;">A</b><span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;"> blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;">She tells the salesman, "I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;">The surprised salesman replies, "But, madam, computers do not have curtains." </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;">And the blonde said, "Helloooo.... I've got Windows!” </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;"><b>A</b> blonde walks into a restaurant to get some lunch, and while she's deciding on what she wants a waitress comes up. The blonde looks up and notices the waitress's name tag on her shirt. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #181818; font-family: "merriweather" , "georgia" , serif;">"Gee, that's nice. What did you name the other one?” </span><br />
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<b>W</b>hat do you call a blonde with one brain cell? Intelligent! ”<br />
“What do you call a blonde with two brain cells? Pregnant!!” </div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet </span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-5663817591225897272017-12-18T20:09:00.001+05:302017-12-18T20:11:03.986+05:30Talent and God's gift!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>D</b>ifference between talent and God gift:</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">A man can give lecture for 2 hours on many subjects. This is talent</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">A woman can give lecture for 2 hour without any subject - this is a God gift!</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>W</b>ife: What is the spelling of Happiness</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Husband: U.N.M.A.R.R.I.E.D.</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>K</b>id: My teacher is cute and beautiful.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Dad: Son, teacher is like mother.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Kid: Selfish, you always think o your self.</span><br />
<br style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif;" />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>W</b>hat's the difference between driving in golf and driving a car?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">When you drive a car you don't want to hit anything. </span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqsi9niSP_CpvPwizC-Z5UFAaf88-tvLi_PLsvNivyk6FOXovnyPOyeAgN5GrDzYk9cLAveFmwOgjdDvFweaA88WZjm3sKLpOvXSRqkHhSoi1eW5LnLwRKM4DCNE7OS-gU9wKGRkTV4QtB/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="184" data-original-width="166" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiqsi9niSP_CpvPwizC-Z5UFAaf88-tvLi_PLsvNivyk6FOXovnyPOyeAgN5GrDzYk9cLAveFmwOgjdDvFweaA88WZjm3sKLpOvXSRqkHhSoi1eW5LnLwRKM4DCNE7OS-gU9wKGRkTV4QtB/s1600/c.jpg" /></a></span></div>
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>C</b>hild : With report card in hand..</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Mother: So whats your final grade?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Child : Underwater</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Mother : what does that mean?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Child: Below C LEVEL (Sea.. you know..)</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;"><b>K</b>ld : (returning from his match in his floor) "Mom", can I have an apple?</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Mom: Baby, you just ate one.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: "arial" , "tahoma" , "helvetica" , "freesans" , sans-serif;">Kid: An apple a day keeps the doctor away and I just broke his window.</span><br />
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Source: Internet</div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-40964769224892880072017-12-17T19:27:00.002+05:302017-12-17T19:27:31.806+05:30Faithful dog!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZpL93fEgr6PA6RvkW4a743K-Kcr4L2dehhkxuzSdIF8BYyUGkz8k4za1Bgj0gGrsQJH7xdKkLY64jyweab_TtIX3F6As0C8oh46UxBGcMlwilZ1azC1Yu7JEgvIvrE8hY9G1qg77mDArY/s1600/c.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="278" data-original-width="181" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZpL93fEgr6PA6RvkW4a743K-Kcr4L2dehhkxuzSdIF8BYyUGkz8k4za1Bgj0gGrsQJH7xdKkLY64jyweab_TtIX3F6As0C8oh46UxBGcMlwilZ1azC1Yu7JEgvIvrE8hY9G1qg77mDArY/s200/c.png" width="130" /></a><b>B</b>efore getting into the surgery room, I left a note for my surgeon to be more cautious and careful while performing the surgery.<br />
After the surgery I found a note from the doctor on my table which read: "I have left my cellphone somewhere. Founder may please contact me..."!<br />
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<b>H</b>ow does the lawyer name his baby daughter?<br />
"Sue...!"<br />
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<b>I</b>n a pet shop, the seller glorifies the specialties of his dog to a prospective buyer. "It is a faithful dog. I have sold this to eleven customers in the past. It remained with each customer for a year and came back to me without fail at the end of the year!" <br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-58159633778527286832017-11-09T20:43:00.000+05:302017-11-09T20:43:31.474+05:30Life in a nutshell!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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*What is LIFE*?<br />
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To understand life better, you have to go to 3 locations : <br />
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ-3NDz1LkIVmUZUP93NkM0Kk6elPnPQtTJP4fgBwR6dzQ8jYpYYwzRdNtCIW-gRhcHcQANjp-X8B6L8XO2QK6isgquoq31xjtyeFt7jldlrVYAUaTPcQUSnrHJ-9wwRClz8o0bOKNk8Tw/s1600/c.png" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="205" data-original-width="248" height="164" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgQ-3NDz1LkIVmUZUP93NkM0Kk6elPnPQtTJP4fgBwR6dzQ8jYpYYwzRdNtCIW-gRhcHcQANjp-X8B6L8XO2QK6isgquoq31xjtyeFt7jldlrVYAUaTPcQUSnrHJ-9wwRClz8o0bOKNk8Tw/s200/c.png" width="200" /></a></div>
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1. Hospital<br />
2. Prison<br />
3. Cemetery<br />
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<img alt="🏥" class="CToWUd" data-goomoji="1f3e5" goomoji="1f3e5" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/e/1f3e5" style="margin: 0px 0.2ex; max-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle;" /> At the Hospital, you will understand that nothing is more beautiful than HEALTH.<br />
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<img alt="🔐" class="CToWUd" data-goomoji="1f510" goomoji="1f510" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/e/1f510" style="margin: 0px 0.2ex; max-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle;" /> In the Prison, you'll see that FREEDOM is the most precious thing.<br />
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<img alt="💐" class="CToWUd" data-goomoji="1f490" goomoji="1f490" src="https://mail.google.com/mail/e/1f490" style="margin: 0px 0.2ex; max-height: 24px; vertical-align: middle;" /> At the Cemetery, you will realize that life is worth nothing. The ground that we walk today will be our roof tomorrow.<br />
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-57067410704281061362017-11-05T17:14:00.000+05:302017-11-05T17:15:26.977+05:30Women or handguns!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixfp3azTqRmRgzJ_eziHYD3clz_7W6S3D8sng4VtuzmRs7mvGhw89jvqW1B8wvobdhSgXz66JioMRV5sabf4kDQAokPrC4adLdVXBZ1NCSm3oCtxca8yKpmVcBS5sUYJAJqDzxNQBqN84N/s1600/c.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: right; float: right; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-left: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="272" data-original-width="185" height="200" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEixfp3azTqRmRgzJ_eziHYD3clz_7W6S3D8sng4VtuzmRs7mvGhw89jvqW1B8wvobdhSgXz66JioMRV5sabf4kDQAokPrC4adLdVXBZ1NCSm3oCtxca8yKpmVcBS5sUYJAJqDzxNQBqN84N/s200/c.jpg" width="136" /></a><span style="font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: x-small;"><b>TOP 10 REASONS </b><br /><br />10 - YOU CAN TRADE IN AN OLD 44 FOR A NEW 22, NO QUESTIONS ASKED.<br /><br />9 - YOU CAN KEEP ONE HANDGUN AT HOME, AND HAVE ANOTHER FOR WHEN YOU'RE ON THE ROAD.<br /><br />8 - IF YOU ADMIRE A FRIEND'S HANDGUN AND TELL HIM SO, HE WILL PROBABLY LET YOU TRY IT OUT A FEW TIMES.<br /><br />7 - YOUR PRIMARY HANDGUN DOESN'T MIND IF YOU KEEP ANOTHER HANDGUN FOR A BACK UP.<br /><br />6 - YOUR HANDGUN WILL STAY WITH YOU EVEN IF YOU RUN OUT OF AMMO.<br /><br />5 - A HANDGUN DOESN'T TAKE UP A LOT OF CLOSET SPACE.<br /><br />4 - HANDGUNS FUNCTION NORMALLY EVERY DAY OF THE MONTH.<br /><br />3 - A HANDGUN DOESN'T ASK, "DO THESE NEW GRIPS MAKE ME LOOK FAT?"<br /><br />2 - A HANDGUN DOESN'T MIND IF YOU GO TO SLEEP AFTER YOU USE IT.<br /><br />1 - YOU CAN BUY A SILENCER FOR A HANDGUN.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "verdana" , "arial"; font-size: x-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2101816089125995809.post-36097624557919674852017-11-03T21:06:00.005+05:302017-11-03T21:06:56.635+05:30Blonde men jokes!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
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<span style="font-size: 12.8px;">After Donald Trump, the world is wondering if it is the blonde men, not women, who are actually a bit dumber. They collected these true stories of blonde men </span></div>
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A blonde man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?"</div>
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He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've already wet mine."</div>
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A blonde man sees a letter lying on his doormat. It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND."</div>
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He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up.</div>
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A blonde man shouts frantically into the phone, "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!"</div>
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"Is this her First Child?" asks the Doctor.</div>
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"No!" he shouts, "this is her husband!"</div>
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A blonde man is in jail, the guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet.</div>
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"Just WHAT are you doing?" he asks.</div>
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"Hanging myself," the blonde replies.</div>
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"The rope should be around your neck," says the guard.</div>
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"I tried that," he replies, "but then I couldn't breathe."</div>
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An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: "Why do scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?"</div>
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To which the blonde man replies: "Dude, If they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat."</div>
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A friend told the blonde man: "Christmas is on a Friday this year."</div>
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The blonde man then said, "Let's hope it's not the 13th."</div>
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Two blonde men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station.</div>
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One asked: "What if one explodes before we get there?"</div>
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The other says: "We'll lie and say we only found two."</div>
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A woman phoned her blonde neighbor man and said: "Close your curtains the next time you and your wife are intimate. The whole street was watching and laughing at YOU yesterday."</div>
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To which the blonde man replied: "Well the joke's on ALL OF YOU because I wasn't even at home yesterday !"</div>
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<span style="font-size: xx-small;">Source: Internet</span></div>
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Rajagopalanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01839337426606954544noreply@blogger.com0