Saturday, November 22, 2014

Kids jokes!

Q: How do you catch a monkey?? A: Climb a tree and act like a banana.

Q: What kind of keys do kids like to carry? A: Cookies!

Q: Why do cowboys ride horses? A: Because they are too heavy to carry!

Q: Who helped the pumpkin across the road? A: The police-GOURD!

Q: why does the man called the fire truck A; because he got fired from his job by his boss

Q: When do astronauts eat? A: At launch time!

What do you call a bear with no teeth? (A gummy bear!)

Q: Who can shave six times a day, but still have a beard? A: A barber.

Doctor, doctor, my husband thinks he's a parachutist. Tell him to drop in and see me.

Q - Tell me 5 animal names A - Cat, cats' Mom, Dad, sister, aunt

Q: Why did the girl sit on the ladder to sing? A: She wanted to reach the high notes!

Kid (over the phone pretending as a dad): Teacher, My kid won't be coming to school today. Madam: Who is speaking? Kid: My dad

Q: What day do chickens hate most? A: Fry-days!

Q: What washes up on very small beaches? A: Microwaves!

Q: What kind of bee can’t make up its mind? A: A maybe

A: What did the moose say to the barber? Q: Thanks for the moose-stache!;D

Q: What is the smartest state? A: Alabama, it has four A's and one B.

HR Harassement!

Friday, November 21, 2014

The Judgement!

A man died and went to The Judgment, they told him , “Before you meet with God, I should tell you — we’ve looked over your life, and to be honest you really didn’t do anything particularly good or bad. We’re not really sure what to do with you. Can you tell us anything you did that can help us make a decision?”

The newly arrived soul thought for a moment and replied, “Yeah, once I was driving along and came upon a person who was being harassed by a group of thugs. So I pulled over, got out a bat, and went up to the leader of the thugs. He was a big, muscular guy with a ring pierced through his lip. Well, I tore the ring out of his lip, and told him he and his gang had better stop bothering this guy or they would have to deal with me!”

“Wow that’s impressive, “When did this happen?” “About three minutes ago,” came the reply.